I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
