yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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