Heybabeimwearingurpanties
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Randomize
