Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
