He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i just google imaged poop.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Randomize
