Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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