My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I think people are normalizing furries
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
