Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
