Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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