do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
i drank out of a bidet.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Randomize
