I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
