does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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