I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
