Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
