You smell like stripper and shame
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
My bed smells like the plague
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
