i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Randomize