you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
