i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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