i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
