It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
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