Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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