Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
