And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
