Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
