Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
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