I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
