i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I touched a dick in church today
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
