We're like a lot better than the average bears
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Randomize
