all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize