i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize