Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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