All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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