you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
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