just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
