and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
