Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
