Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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