its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize
