Your dad touched me again.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
