So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
