Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
