If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
