I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize