i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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