I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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