forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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