Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
