that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize
