Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
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