ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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